Remembering Rita Hester
Rita Hester would have been 60 years old this month. As I stare at this photo, all I can feel in my chest is this longing to hear what Rita’s laugh would sound like now. What it sounded like then. What it would sound like in 2044. What it sounded like in 1963. That chilly November, there you were, Rita, a trailblazing angel we all would speak into the room for generations to come.
Rita Hester was known as a bridge builder between worlds, her love exuded this divine alchemy of contradiction that nurtured a world where polarity, nuance, and complexity could bring forth a deeper sense of love and community. When Rita was taken from us, it sparked so much rage and love and grief and connection–a divine expansion of emotion, a permission to feel beyond our limits.
Growing old is not an experience that trans people are often afforded in our world. I wish you got to grow old, Rita. I wish I didn’t learn about you as a memorial. As an example of what it means to be remembered after being taken.
“What kinds of bodies count when they’re bashed?” (asked by Riki Anne Wilchins in The Advocate in 1999 in response to Rita’s murder)
The question still remains to this day. Who gets to be grieved? Remembered? Who gets to be safe?
On this Trans Day of Remembrance, I ask you: how do you wish to be remembered? How do we create a world where trans people get to grow old? What would it take to build that world together?
We have experienced unthinkable, unimaginable, unfathomable things socially and politically for generations and especially in the wake of a heartbreaking and infuriating election cycle. How do we keep each other safe?
As we grieve and experience our fury, please remember to hold your trans beloveds close to your chest, and allow others to hold you close to theirs. Breathe life into their aliveness, and allow others to breathe that aliveness back into yours. Each moment you are here is a miraculous space of revolution, even in our messiest, most unraveled moments. Thank you for choosing your aliveness, thank you for existing in times where systems would prefer we did not.
Trans Lifeline is committed to building a world where you get to grow old, a world that Rita would be so proud of.
Take good care; we are here for you.
Big love & solidarity,
kai alviar horton (he/they)
Executive Director of Trans Lifeline
